8 Things I wish I knew before I became a foster parent

8. Although I'd spent 1,170 days with 7-8 year olds in the classroom, I still don't feel like I know some basic things about what she needs. For instance, how much water do kids need to drink everyday? Is it ok for her to eat cake after 8:00? How the heck am I supposed to understand her shoe size (and why do I have to return every single piece of clothing I buy for her?) We're still making this stuff up and learning as we go, but I guess all parents do that.

7. I wish I'd known that we needed to have "names" picked out for us before our little one was sitting at our dining room table asking us if she could call me her stepmom. For now, we're "Mr. Brian and Ms. Julie." This gets pretty tricky, though, in front of her friends when she hasn't told them she's a foster kid.

6. I wish I'd known that once she stepped through the door, any chance of me organizing my files, or my piles, went out the door behind her and this is what we'd be living with. My piles haven't gotten any better. They've only gotten worse.

5. I wish I'd known that I'd never watch TV ever again. Seriously. Never, ever again.

4. I wish I'd known that she'd be more attached to our dog and our friends than to us.

3. Despite her unattached attitude, I wish I'd known that we could get THAT attached that quickly.

2. I wish I'd known that just because we felt called to do this, that didn't mean everyone in our families heard the same thing, understood what foster care is, or understood why we'd want to get involved. I wasn't prepared for this AT ALL. If you're considering fostering/fostering-to-adopt, please spend time educating your family on the system and help them understand why you want to do this. Make it super clear what you need from them emotionally to feel supported and talk through as many questions as possible before you bring a child into your home. Help them understand that this is much more than being a month-long babysitter; this child will instantly be a part of your family and they deserve to be treated as such.

1. Despite my fears and my feelings of there's-no-way-I can-be-an-overnight-parent, I really was equipped with everything I needed because at the end of the day, all our girl wants is love, some hugs, some consistency, and gravy. And we're able to give her 3 of those 4 things everyday, and sometimes we're even able to give her all 4.

LL's quotes:
- "Do gnats go to Heaven?"
- "I'll be outta here in lickily split!" (No, that's not a spelling error.) :)
- LL: "My uncle had heart surgery and he has a scar on his chest now. It looks like the skin is soft, but it's actually really hard." Me: "Yep, that's called scar tissue." LL: "You could blow your nose with it." Me: "Huh?" LL: "Cause it's tissue."

LL got her own card in the mail from Jan! She was excited to get her own mail. 

Singing along to Frozen and hula hooping, you know, our typical after school activities. 

We love our unicorn towel! Thanks, Jilly!!!!

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About Us: 

We began our foster journey in mid-August 2013. We finished our classes in October, had our home study in early January, and we were licensed on February 7, 2014. After seven calls from CPS, we received our first placement, a 7-year-old girl (our Little Lady, or LL for short) on April 3, 2014. Thank you so much for taking the time to read about our journey through the craziness that is foster care. Most importantly, thanks for your prayers, love, and support. We hope to encourage fellow foster/adoptive parents as we document our ups and downs each day. 

Key Posts:

We are Facebook-Official!

Saying goodbye to someone I've never met

Will you get a white one?

Yup, it's gonna hurt.

Day 1 with our Little Lady

Oasis