4/21/14

Questions I can't answer

The following is a short list of questions I can't answer about the little girl living one room over from us.

- What is she allergic to? I don't know. Every time I give her a new food, I don't actually know if it will kill her.
- Did everyone tell you she looks like the girl from the parent trap when she was little? Don't know, I didn't know her then.
- Would you like to buy school supplies for 2nd grade? I don't know if she'll still be here, so no, I'm not gonna drop 60 bones on supplies, thanks.
- Has she ever been exposed to lead paint? I have no idea.
- Has she ever been hospitalized, or broken any bones, or had the chicken pox? Is there anything we should know about in her family's medical history? No clue.

These are questions "normal" parents would have the answers to. They'd recall exactly how they felt the moment they heard their child's screams when they broke their first bone. Or how they were willing to die for their child the night they had to take them to the hospital for the first time, had a fever that was just a little too high, or watched them suffer through pain, embarrassment, or loss.

Not only do we not have the memories, we don't even know the stories.

And then there are the questions she asks.
- Why can't I jump on the trampoline?
- Why do I need to ask you to go inside the house with me when we're at someone else's house?
- When will I see my mom again?
- Am I gonna have to live here forever? I don't want to live here my whole life.
- If my dentist appointment is in 8 days, will I still be here? Or, my field trip is on Wednesday - will I still be here then?

There is so much uncertainty that hangs over our head all day long, but thankfully, there are a few questions we can answer.

Who loves this Little Lady more than anything in the universe? Who loved her before she was even born, and before she was neglected and forgotten? The Creator, the Almighty, Jesus. He knows every story, every hurt, every memory, and every loss. He's been there with her from the beginning, and He's with her still.

Why are you doing this? Why would you want to be foster parents? Simply put, God has called us to do this right now.

How will you possibly get through the loss if/when she has to leave? Prayer, hugs, tears, and probably a whole lot of chocolate.







LL's quotes:
- Last night Bry fell asleep with headphones in his ears. LL could hear the music and she said, "Hmm. That's a catchy beat!"

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About Us: 

We began our foster journey in mid-August 2013. We finished our classes in October, had our home study in early January, and we were licensed on February 7, 2014. After seven calls from CPS, we received our first placement, a 7-year-old girl (our Little Lady, or LL for short) on April 3, 2014. Thank you so much for taking the time to read about our journey through the craziness that is foster care. Most importantly, thanks for your prayers, love, and support. We hope to encourage fellow foster/adoptive parents as we document our ups and downs each day. 

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